Sunday, October 23, 2011

Super stressed...

Its gotten to the point where I'm literally like... crying every couple of minutes.

I feel like I'm breaking... completely falling apart. I know where my goal is, and I want to be there so bad... I'm climbing so high, but I can feel my grip slipping. I'm so close to the top, I don't want to just slide on down to the bottom... and then an avalanche hits.

I literally just got off of a break that really didn't exist... and I'm still super stressed. I might take a sick day at some point... even though I can't really afford it.

I don't know what to do.

Maybe I'll finish what I'm doing and go to sleep...

and maybe I'll seek out some help tomorrow, because... I feel like that's what I need. My friends are great, but I think its finally time I seek out some professional help from someone. There are places here on campus that I can go to... maybe I'll spend my lesson tomorrow just talking about places I can go to. I don't know.

... I feel cold, but my face is hot. I'm like a giant, walking contradiction at the moment. I want to cry, but I don't. I want to go back home, but I can't because I want to stay at school.

Maybe this is an extreme case of being homesick.

Or maybe I really am suffering from depression.

I don't know.

No comments: